Corny rappers get mad in some pretty awesome ways. I know this because I’ve witnessed it on multiple occasions. (And done a few of them myself while mad!)
Here’s a list of ten things I’ve personally seen corny rappers do when they get mad. How many of these things have YOU seen corny rappers doing?
1. Listen to Sean Price
“Listen. All joking aside, all vocals aside, I will fuck your ass up, pa. What the f@ck I look like?”
There is nothing better than listening to Sean Price after a f@cked up day at work (or on the way to what’s going to be an undoubtedly f@cked up day at work). Price is one of the rawest rappers on the planet. He doesn’t give a sh#t. Listening to (and rapping alongside) him talk about beating up gangsters and shooting drug dealers is a great way to let off some steam.
2. Drink Jameson
Everybody knows that you will never find that answer to a problem at the bottom of a bottle, but there isn’t a more fun place to look.
3. Mean mug people while walking around a safe place
This is great after drinking Jameson and listening to Sean P.
Go to a place where you are SURE that nobody will want to start a problem, and walk around looking at people like You don’t want a problem!!!
It’s awesome. I promise you will feel SUPER tough before, during, and after.
4. Wear a zip-up hoodie and walk around outside with your hood on
The key to wearing a zip-up hoodie and walking around outside with your hood on is to keep a straight face, keep a brisk pace, and avoid eye contact. If done correctly people will think you have a very unhappy and important place to be, and the only way to get there is on foot, fast.
Note: This is also good exercise.
5. Play Call of Duty
This is an especially good activity if you have a headset. Put on some Sean P, talk shit to some 8th graders, and let virtual bullets fly.
6. Watch the first half of Goodfellas
Goodfellas: A movie we can all relate to. Watching the bad guys win (while drinking Jameson) is a great way to get away for a while and let your nerves settle down.
7. Write a diss track to all of the haters
OMG! Find something or someone to blame all of your problems on and write a song about it!
Writing a diss track is a great way to avoid taking responsibility for decisions you’ve made with negative consequences.
8. Slam doors
Nothing says, “I’m super sensitive and can’t believe she doesn’t love me like I love her,” like bursting the door of your local bar and grill open while slamming it, and storming out. Never a pretty scene – especially since everyone knows the dude [read: you] is just going to go home and write a diss track.
9. Yell really loud from the inside of your car
This one is for the rappers who have cars.
When things get really bad, turn the music up and scream as loud as you can. It feels good getting it out (that’s what she said).
10. Be quiet and act like you aren’t mad
This is the best! My favorite is screaming, “I’m not mad! Leave me alone idiot!”
Haha.
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